The Transience of Life
a meditation
Something that has been on my mind as of late is the transience of life. We think a particularly pressing problem, an enjoyable environment, or a favourable friendship will last. That there exists a certain permanence to our current circumstances. And yet, things change. We know that things change but do not believe what we are going through now will.
Perhaps it is convenient to think in these terms. To be in the moment and indulge ourselves in the illusion. That our present peace and good times will continue to roll on. Why can’t we enjoy ourselves a little? What’s wrong with basking in denial? We’re all going to die anyways so why not savour what we have? Let’s take a load off and appreciate what we have while it’s here.
However, I would like to argue that it’s better to face the transience of life directly. To not become complacent and stand up to the truth: the only constant in life is change. Now one option is to be in denial of this change and desperately cling on to your present situation. A more noble option, I believe, is to move in accordance with the change and accept where it leads. Swim with the downstream current of change and be open to where it takes you.
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Imagine yourself as a fluid creature. Something that is malleable to adversity and stress. Consider the utility flexibility provides as opposed to rigidity. A key aspect of flexibility is being adaptable to change. Gauge your own life and determine the degree to which you are adaptable. When things don’t go according to plan, how do you react? When you receive news that fundamentally changes the trajectory of your life, how do you respond? Do you enjoy moving to new environments or would you rather stay put?
Think carefully about each of the posed questions to attain a better sense of yourself. Then take into consideration the following spectrum of adaptability. On the left side of the spectrum is something I’ll call adaptaphobic (averse to adaptability) and on the right side of the spectrum is adaptaphilic (drawn towards adaptability). Where do you place yourself in this spectrum? Depending on where you land will determine how well adjusted you are to the transient nature of life.
Being more adaptaphilic or adaptaphobic is not necessarily a good or bad thing. The knowledge of which trait better suits you is valuable however. Having this self-awareness serves as a compass for how you navigate the world. For whether or not you embrace or resist change that is outside your control. Commit fully to your designated trait and consider its potential blindspots. Somebody who is overly adaptaphobic is prone to miss out on the rewards that come with being adaptable to change. Conversely, somebody who is overly adaptaphilic is susceptible to adapt too much even when a change can do them harm. It is ideal to be somewhere in the middle of the spectrum to minimize these blindspots.
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Another means for understanding the transience of life is to meditate on our own mortality. No one knows the day that they will die. Placing intentional thoughts on the fact that we will die, enables us to live more fully. To not take our existence for granted. To treasure our relationships. To be grateful today, not tomorrow. It is when we face our mortality directly that we can then ask ourselves, what is essential? What must I do with the finite time I have at my disposal? How do I want to be remembered by my friends and family after I pass on?
Meditating on our mortality should be a continual practice. By carrying the final destination in the back of our mind, we can live more deliberately. Live with more urgency. Tell our loved ones we love them today, not tomorrow. Hug our friends a little tighter. Express our emotions a little more freely. Perform more acts of kindness. Acknowledge the beauty in everyday life. Be completely present. This is the kind of life worth living.